Three phrases I hate in the Christian Community

I got a question today that I answered with too many words to fit in the side-bar. (Me give a wordy answer to a short question? Impossible! :-) So I thought I'd put in here. For the Easter sermon go down to next post. Your Shepnerd.

Question: I've always heard the old saying "God does not give usmore than we can handle" and sometimes I want to think its true, but it got me to thinking. If He doesn't give us more than we can handle how are things like terminal illnesses and violent crimes that result in murder figured into this? Seems like if God didn't give us more than wecould handle then these things wouldn't happen.

Long Answer: I have three pet peeves that people say in Christian Communities all the time.

1. "The church is God's House" - No. God doesn't need a house. God doesn't need shelter. God IS shelter.

2. "God helps those who help themselves" - No. Ben Franklin said this (not the bible), and if God just wanted us to help ourselves then we wouldn't need God, Prayer or Jesus. Throw this phrase out with last year's almanac.

3. "God doesn't give us more than we can handle." No. That's not in the bible; its a greeting card phrase people say to each other when we don't know what to say to help them in their grief and want to brush off the issue. It's not helpful, and damaging to people who encounter life issues they are having trouble with. Suddenly, not only do you feel victimized, you feel like you lack faith too.

First, God doesn't GIVE us these things. Imagine you have been sent to teach someone about God. You say, "Knowing the God who made you and loves you will change your life. The relationship can provide you with insight, support, salvation, balance and joy. God will also give you cancer, make you the victim of a crime, cause a hurricane to wipe out your house, take away your job, give your son a drug habit, put your daughter in an abusive marriage, and just when you are ready for your golden years take away your spouse's mind so they no longer remember who you are. Now, don't you want to know God better?" Ludicrous! Yes, and so is the phrase that supports it.

Cancer happens because God designed us to be in a sustained natural world. Some genes, some bodies reacting that create great things like musical talent and pretty blue eyes. Some genes, some bodies react in ways that create cancer, or contract or spread viruses. God doesn't give us illness, illness happens to natural bodies in a natural world.

Hurricanes happen because the water in the ocean gets too hot and the natural balance of the system is to correct it through having the heat rise, which works with the natural turning of the earth to become circular energy (short and easy explanation for a complex phenominon). Crime happens because empty and hurt people tend to hurt other people. Drugs happen because there is pain. War happens because there is evil.

It's always been funny to me that we can accept Jesus teaching "If you ask for bread will God give you a stone? No, God will give good gifts..." but then turn around and suggest God gives you abusive lovers, arthritis and Alzheimer's disease.

Second, not all things can be "handled". Some things must be accepted. Some things must be endured. Some things should be challenged. Some events can be healed by a scalpel. Some events can require a healing process several years long. Some houses are lost. Some lives need rebuilt. "Handling" implies we have some kind of control. Usually, in the situation where people say this terrible phrase - we don't.

God is not powerless but all powerful. And when God designed this natural system of life, death, rebirth - for the earth and for us -God promised to go through these things with us. God carries us. God cries with us. God heals us.

A better alternative to this phrase is Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love God and who have been called according to God's purpose." That doesn't mean that all things that happen are good. God doesn't want drunk drivers to kill children, God doesn't want divorce, drugs or homelessness. God doesn't think those things are good. What it does mean is that out of the situations we encounter - those we make, and those made for us by the other people on the planet and the planet itself -- God can work with us to bring good things into our life and our world.

People with diseases raise awareness, research money and hope. Susan G Komen died of cancer (not good), her family created her foundation that has saved the lives of millions of women through mammograms, drugs, and research (a great good). Women who have been victimized become survivors and learn how to stand up with and heal other women. Tornados that wreck someone's life create a whole community of effort to repair and rebuild. Does God need a tornado to create community? No. But since one is going to happen - God wants to be there too and use it for what good can come.

So my best thought is ditch the easy phrases and hold on to God's truth.